Sid Bacon

I did manage to go to work today for a few hours.  It was nice to be in and to see my friends and colleagues.  Unfortunately, I didn’t feel as well as I had hoped, so Cathy re-arranged her schedule so we could come home earlier than we had originally planned.  She is always taking care of me … thankfully.  This was a stark reminder that I have a long way to go still, and that I need to be prepared to fight that much harder.  Disappointing to be sure, but little setbacks are to be expected and dealt with.  And that is what we’ll do. 
 

One of the things Cathy and I did today was hang a couple posters in my office that people have sent to me recently.   One was from friends and colleagues at Vanderbilt University, the university where I began my academic career about 25 years ago.  The poster on my wall is shown here. The other was the poster (actually, two posters) that some of my friends and colleagues made for me while they were attending the Association for Research in Otolaryngology conference I mentioned in a previous blog (29 February).  I’ll highlight it tomorrow, as we can only do one picture per blog. It was nice to get these on the wall; I’ll look forward to seeing them every time I am in.  They look great!
 

Tomorrow I have a quick dentist appointment (for a permanent crown …) and then on to Mayo for a routine follow-up appointment with the Palliative care team that took care of my pain management while I was in the hospital.  We aren’t sure what to expect of that appointment, but it will be good to follow-up with them and get any information they may want to share.  As a consequence of these afternoon appointments, the blog will be late again tomorrow.  Thanks for your patience.

Before I talk about my day, I just want to show you the side-by-side poster made by my friends and colleagues, mentioned yesterday and in the 29 February blog.  It looks great in my office.  It and the Vanderbilt poster will brighten my day every time I am in … thanks to all who made both posters possible!
 

Today is starting out to be a better day than yesterday … less nausea, although I still do not have much of an appetite.  It can be a struggle to eat, especially in the morning, but we are working our way through it as best we can.
 

After my appointments:
 

The dentist appointment went well. It didn’t take long for them to install my permanent crown.  We then went to In N Out Burger for lunch before going to Mayo for the follow-up appointment with Palliative Care.  The focus of the Mayo appointment was how to deal more effectively with my nausea.  We are going to try a slightly different medication now, and have the option yet for different medications if this is not effective.  We definitely need to get this under control.   I, unfortunately, was nauseous throughout the Mayo appointment ... presumably because I ate too much for lunch.  Cathy got me home (1-hour drive) just in time before I got sick.  Fortunately this doesn’t happen often, but it did this time.  I’m still not feeling that great, so I’m going to close now and write more tomorrow … I will definitely feel better then. 

I have said it many times before: We are fighting together!  I believe that.  And there was no better indication of that to me than yesterday’s guestbook entries.  I was touched by the support you offered in your entries, support that was not only greatly appreciated but sincerely needed.  I haven’t had many bad days in my journey, days when I haven’t felt well physically and/or emotionally, but the last couple days have been on the more difficult side in both domains.  It has been a tough week.  It is hard to feel well emotionally when you aren’t feeling well physically.  And because I’ve been feeling so much better overall over the past month or so, I grow to expect positive progress on a regular, almost daily basis.  Unfortunately, it is not that easy.   There will be ups and downs. I need to do a better job dealing with the downs.  We will solve this nausea problem and I will continue to feel better and better.  I am sure of it.  Thanks for your support!  Thanks for fighting with me.  I couldn’t do this without you.
 

Dan was correct in his guestbook entry. I forgot to mention in my journal entry that I weighed in yesterday a bit over 2 pounds heavier than the previous week.  I am now roughly 10 pounds below the weight I was before my symptoms emerged (that is up from 20 pounds below).  Not bad!  More importantly, at least for the wedding and fitting into my suit, I think a good portion of the weight I still have to gain is muscle weight.  My pants seem to fit well and I suspect my jacket will fit well, too.  So, I just need to stay steady or gain a bit more, and I’ll be good to go.  Not bad for someone without an appetite.  (Plus, there is no need to be more buff than the groom, so I’ll take it easy on weights for a while J) I have Cathy to thank for getting as many calories in me as possible.  She is making sure I get plenty to eat and that my calories are also full of protein.  I couldn’t do this without her.  No question.  I am so incredibly lucky to have her by my side …
 

Although I woke up today with nausea, I have eaten reasonably well.  I feel much better now.  That has been the trend … I feel worse in the morning and start to feel much better by late morning.  Thank goodness for that.  Cathy and I went on our walk this morning after she went on her 3-mile run in the desert.  I kept our walk shorter than usual (a bit under 2 miles) … it is good to listen to my body and not push it too much, but still good to get some exercise.  I think it was a good compromise.  Plus, any excuse to go on a walk with Cathy is a good one!
 

Dan is coming home Thursday night for a long weekend.  It will be great to have him here.  I suspect Laura will join us for at least some of the weekend, and we’ll all definitely be glued to the TV watching the OSU-KU basketball game on Saturday.   It will be fun, and I will remember that it is just a game (but one that I hope has a good outcome for the Jayhawks!). 
 

A friend is coming over to visit after work tonight.  I haven’t seen her for over two months; I very much look forward to her visit. These visits are part of the fight.
 

Thank you all.  Thank you for fighting with and for me! 

Today has been a much better day than either Monday or Tuesday, and possibly even better than yesterday, although yesterday turned out to be pretty good.  I had just a bit of nausea this morning – maybe the new medication is helping to resolve that discomfort – and I have been able to eat throughout the day.  I didn’t want anything other than saltine crackers and carnation instant breakfast to start, but Cathy made some really good fried potatoes after our walk, which hit the spot and started me on a good eating trend.  What would I do without her?
 

Cathy and I have both been working at home for most of the day today.  I prefer these days to the days like yesterday, where she had to go into work for most of the day.  She had everything set up for me before she left, so of course I survived, but it just is not as much fun!  There is something special about being with your best friend, even when you are in separate rooms working on different computers!
 

One of the things I struggle with on occasion is low blood pressure.  I’ve been struggling with it the past few days.  I’m not sure why I have it, whether it is due to medications or possibly the disease (I read that severe pancreatitis can cause low blood pressure, so perhaps a tumor on the pancreas can do the same).  The low blood pressure makes me more tired and lethargic than I’d like to be.  Otherwise, it is not a big problem.  I’ll ask about it the next time I am at Piper for treatment.
 

I go to Piper tomorrow for a routine blood draw at 11:45, followed by my first post-treatment CT scan (they are scheduled for every two months of treatment).  This scan is critically important.  It will tell us whether or not the tumor has responded to the chemotherapy.  That, in turn, will determine next steps in the treatment.  If the tumor is responding by either staying the same size or shrinking, then we’ll keep going with the current regimen of chemotherapy drugs.  If it has increased in size, we’ll move on to a different regimen.  My first choice, of course, is that the tumor has been reduced in size, thus allowing us to continue with the current regimen for another two months and hopefully another four months (four cycles).  After that, we thenwould definitely move on to the different regimen (in turn, for another six months or cycles, assuming some success with shrinking the tumor). 
 

Unfortunately, we will not know the outcome of the scan until next Thursday – ugh! At that time, the blood draw prior to chemo will include the monthly measure of the cancer antigen CA19-9.  You may recall that this value decreased last month relative to its baseline value – a very good sign!  I guess they want to present the new CA19-9 results along with the CT scan results at the same time …  Still, I’m going to ask if they might read the scan sooner and let me know before next Thursday, just so we aren’t on pins and needles for almost an entire week.  They have been very reassuring and have told me not to be nervous, but …
 

Regardless of when we get the scan results, please send good thoughts and vibrations our way tomorrow.  This is a real milestone in our treatment and we could use some really good results!  Thanks!

I’m going to keep this short (and fat) … I weighed in at Piper today prior to my blood draw a full 4 pounds heavier than last Thursday!  We talked about a 2-pound gain earlier this week, but that was from one scale at one building to another scale at a different building … apples and oranges.   I’m now only about 8 pounds less than what I weighed prior to the onset of my symptoms.  Not bad!
 

Thanks for all your good thoughts, vibes, and prayers today.  We’ll know just how effective they all were next Thursday, at which time I am confident we will receive news that the tumor has shrunk and that we will keep on with our current chemo regimen.  It will be a relief to get the news, but until then we will just have faith.
 

Speaking of faith … I believe that the Jayhawks will win tomorrow and that anyone left in the tournament could beat Kentucky on any given night (just ask Vanderbilt and Indiana).  I’m not looking ahead to Kentucky (and I hope the KU players are not, either) … after all it could be Louisville in the finals!
 

Enjoy the games if you are so inclined, but regardless, please root for the Jayhawks!